Summer.
Very depressing season for me T_T



Um...so please try to bear with me as I survive these next few months x_o

It'll get really bad towards the end of each month I assure you xD
lolsrysry....



but um... so my dad seems to be concretely stuck to his belief that I'm a useless bitch and that my brother is an angel or something...

I'd like to think I'm not, however...
But... Idunno...

I'd like to believe I make people happy? D:
Sometimes...maybe?...no...?


Yeah, so I'm a bitch T_T
But I'm not .. useless, right?
I mean... I do more than him! He just sits on his lazy fat ass all day and watches sports >O
Or sometimes when he's feeling really active, he'll go downstairs and play video games or something....




This whole... creation vs evolution thing is tearing me apart...
Because I've been on both sides of the argument in my life and I don't know what to believe anymore...
And I know this is going to get a lot of angry comments or something and whatever and that's fine......

With my parents being so religious... I often wonder what would happen if I came home one day and told them I am an atheist... or... agnostic... technically more agnostic I guess...

And this is what I would assume to be their reaction:
either
A) shock, disbelief, ignorance, oh its just another phase
or
B) Label me as the antichrist, shun me forever and either kick me out on the streets or start making me go to church on Sundays again (idunno which would be worse...)


Sigh... Life can be so confusing... And the worst part of it is...
Is that nobody really knows for sure! There is no solid absolute proof towards anything (ok, now i'm leaning towards the beginning more than evolution vs creation, btw evolution is the basic fact that things change over periods of time to adapt to their surroundings and such...)
We don't know...
And I don't care what people believe in...
Go ahead and tell me you believe that a giant purple fuzzy unicorn barfed up all existence... I really don't care

Its just... when we have our theories and beliefs on how things were created and whatever... everyone states their personal belief as a fact. Not a fact, the fact. And when you have a million and one religions and beliefs out there, all claiming to be ///the one truth///
its... hard... i guess

especially because we don't know....


and so... i'm a little torn right now...

The fact I don't know the beginning haunts me... but i refuse to defy logic and believe some thing written in a book...

I'm... not trying to insult anyone's beliefs or anything...

idunno i'm just confused and torn...
Summer's depressing and it's 8 am and I didn't sleep last night...



Guys are abusive...
Or.. at least the ones I know -- for the most part...
Kinda sucks...


So as far as art goes... Idunno when i'll get things scanned in... I've still gotta clean my room *glares down the hallway*
It... really needs it...
=///=
It... really sucks


um... sorry for the epic journal abuse lately... Bear with me, okay?
Things'll get better...
I kinda feel lonely cuz Zach's helping his dad build a shed so I haven't been able to see him or talk to him much...



I need sleep... but I don't wanna sleep.... I really really do not want to sleep...

I'll probably... take a long shower..... and try to survive the day...

I guess.

Idunno...
Maybe I'll be on later, maybe not.. but Idunno


-Das Fuchs